Smile

Smiling at my Ali.

I was reminiscing on old posts and I was reintroduced to this Kim McMillen quote, "When I loved myself enough, I began leaving whatever wasn’t healthy. This meant people, jobs, my own beliefs and habits - anything that kept me small. My judgement called it disloyal. Now I see it as self-loving." Again, it was a reaffirming moment for me. I am leaving my current everything, picking up and going to a place that brings me warmth. I've been presented with an opportunity I never saw coming. And it's all because I am following my happiness. I had no set plan, I just wanted that warmth again. I feel as though all my Joseph Campell readings starting spinning and flashing in my head, "follow your bliss" If you follow your bliss good things come to you. No wonder I'm drawn to his philosophy. 

Anyway, my best friend will be here this weekend and I could cry of happiness. I truly know no one that makes me laugh as much as her, nor that believes in me and understands me better than her. She has such a strong, powerful exterior, but my god, is she compassionate, understanding, and really fucking real. I've seen her softness and it made me a better person. I love Devon so much. Honestly, truly, that girl is my soulmate in this life. We are so different in aesthetics, but all our dreams are weaved together. Anyway, this was a strange tangent. But today has been a hard day and I'm trying to get better at just forgetting the negative. Throwing it out, smiling and looking at the positive. There is something in yoga where when you are doing a difficult pose, it's often said for you to smile while you're doing it so you don't get stuck in that frustration or that pain of doing something hard. Rather, making something light-hearted of it. Smiling. Having fun, because really that is what life's about. Our responsibilities make us think otherwise, but when it's feeling like too much, smile.

Also, this quote really hit my heart strings and allowed me to shift my perspective. This is absolutely beautiful.

"Forgive me that I ignored the sun 

And that I lived in sorrow."Anna Akhmatova 

(translated by Judith Hemschemeyer)